...The Right to Write - Exercise

Initiation Tool - create "Morning Pages", writing 3 pages longhand every morning (90 days straight)

Sun. Aug. 15, 2010 - "Morning Pages" Day #5 - A Bay Ridge Dunkin' Donuts

Trying to figure out what to write is difficult. Trying to figure out what to write when you're still trying to figure out why Bay Watch is airing this morning at 9 AM on Comedy Central is more difficult. But then you take a couple sips of this here ice coffee and things become clearer. The person that decided to put Bay Watch on Comedy Central is either extremley hilarious, or the show's on because David Hasselwoff's Roast is airing tonight - Let 'em have it Lisa Lampanelli. I love "LL"...Sit and watch Bay Watch on Comedy Central and you will realize it was meant to be a comedy all along. Comedy Central doesn't even have to write and come up with their shows anymore. Put Bay Watch on there, a couple hours of President Bush's press conferences, some Sarah Palin interviews, and keep the Daily Show and Colbert Report, and the stations as funny as ever. Sarah Palin was SNL's best writer a couple years ago. That's why she quite (resigned!) being Alaska's governor. She's focusing on her comedy career now. Also, add Seventh Heaven (show's hilarious) and Martin (Marr-tin!) to Comedy Central's lineup. Or, even better - create new shows -- Martin, as it is, but split screen...one half Martin, and the other half showing the Palin family sitting down watching Martin...

...Dunkin' Donuts ice coffee = 2 dollars and 25 cents; something you purchased at the 99 Cents store = not 99 Cents; a McDonalds' chococlate milkshake = not sure the cost, Bay Ridge's machines are always broken, or they pour vanilla shakes, trying to pass it off to me as a chocolate shake, leading me to bring it back and point to the cup, "What? Do you think I work at McDonalds? Chocolate shake please"...One more example before the dismount...a pound of ham from the corner deli = $9.37, well then it's $8.67...The Palin family's expressions while watching Martin = Priceless. To even this out, also add the split screen with Ice Cube's family watching Seventh Heaven...Come on Comedy Central. I like the direction you're going in with Bay Watch. Consider my ideas. Remember my last "Morning Pages". I've won awards for my ideas. I've got many more too, so also consider hiring me. I need a job! Unemployment isn't affording me much except the time to write these "Morning Pages" in the first place. And, I am in first place by the way, I'm not?...In case you didn't know and didn't listen to the advice of "you better ask somebody", and now you still don't know -- "Life's a marathon"...and "A box of chocolates"...which is giving me cramps while running the marathon and it's not even that time of month for me yet.

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I thought of writing a poem for you. I thought of writing a love letter. I rejected those ideas and thought of writing something more concise like a Romance novel. The masses are sick of me writing Romance novels. They say, "Garrett, you're so talented, try another genre"...Ok, so here I am trying this comedy thing. Here I am. I repeat, here I am, not in care you forget, but in case I do. -- A sidebar from the forever-enticing conversation I was having with myself before -- but, I didn't sleep great again last night. I've slept much better over this past year, but am still constantly telling myself what I just wrote - Here I am - or I'll ask the question, "Am I really here?" Yeah, I'm in New York City, and many who didn't grow up here (which I didn't even though with every step and breath, I scream Brooklyn!) think to themselves, "I can't believe I'm actually here, living in New York City." No, that's not what I'm saying to myself...I walk down the street, attempting my new walks, trying them out in Bay Ridge, hoping the Manhattanites will one day accept my new walk. Manhattan walks have become so commercialized though. I'll be walking down the street, from the deli to my apartment, ham pound in hand, and suddenly be like, "Wow, wait, I'm walking down the street." I know I was walking down the street, but there's a difference in casually knowing and truly being present. I'm guessing I'll look back and not remember much of what I've written. I'm sure many writers, if they've written enough, forget much of what they've written. But, at least they were present at the time (maybe not?). As I'm writing, I almost completely forgot I'm in a Dunkin' Donuts, and it has nothing to do with my great focus on this writing. Sleep deprivation disconnects you from being present, your mind's always elsewhere. Being present I think is the most important thing in life. And maybe, writing like I am now, I feel it Ms. Cameron, I'm channeling (my inner-beard again), will lead me to being present again, or at the very least, I can look back and physically see what I've created. It's a love-hate relationship I've got with this sleeping problem. I would never have written those "Sunday Mo Jos" or those songs without being somewhat disconnected. I've called sleep deprivation before - the absence of being present. I don't want to celebrate it, but maybe I should channel it and convert it to thinking it's being completely present. It does allow me (at times) to forget thinking and just write, that channeling Ms. Cameron teaches. But, when it comes to sleeping again, my mind won't shut off and I can't stop thinking, the thoughts so random and unrelated to one another. For now, I'm signing off for today's "Morning Pages". I'm sure I'll bring up insomnia again. Who knows, maybe I actually have written Romance novels and dropped them on my way back from the deli...who knows?...yeah, whos knows?